How nature can heal
I would like to share the story of how I started nature journaling and how it helped me heal my body and get my life back from a debilitating health condition.
I have suffered from a chronic illness for many years, a problem of the autonomic nervous system. At my lowest point the illness was completely debilitating and I passed most of my time in bed, unable to work. Sometimes I was so exhausted I lacked even the strength to hold a book. Sometimes my sympathetic nervous system was so highly activated that even listening to an audiobook felt like an overwhelming stress. Some days there was nothing I was able to do except lie motionless in my bed. Through all this, nature was a force that buoyed me and allowed me to remain connected to the world outside of myself.
Below is something I wrote in my notebook during this time. It shows how I was still able to connect with nature and enjoy its healing benefit, even on days when I was unable to leave the house:
15/10/2012
“As I lie here in my bed, a wind sweeps in through the open door. With it comes the smell of the outdoors, of the soil, as well as something sun-warmed, green and alive. The smell connects me with the world. Even though, for now, I am confined to my bed, there is a wildness to which I belong and can access in small ways whenever I need to connect with and be reminded of it, of my own true nature.”
On my better days I was able to go out into the backyard and I would sit on a deck chair and watch the trees and follow the activities of birds and other creatures. This became my sit-spot. It gave me so much joy to notice the changes that were occurring around me in this small patch of green space. Two crows were nesting high in a gum tree. I was thrilled to see their nest and to watch their comings and goings. Then I started to notice other nests, other birds, and the multitude of wild activity that was going on around me. A suburban backyard is absolutely full of life, when you take time to notice it.
I began to write down all these things in a notebook and add some sketches here and there. I wrote about the changes I was seeing and also about how I felt during my time in nature. When I was able, I would go to the park in front of my house and sketch there too, or just sketch the park from my bedroom window. I noticed that one of the trees I could see was losing its leaves in spring instead of autumn and this brought many questions to mind. I wrote the questions in my journal.
Nature observation and nature journaling became a type of meditation for me; a way to slow the mind, calm the nervous system and stay connected with myself and with the world. Although this time in my life was full of uncertainty and physical limitations, I found a calm and centred place and felt happiness and fulfillment deeper than ever before. Through close observation of nature, I was able to live fully in the present moment. Documenting the backyard in my nature journal gave my life structure and purpose and kept my mind focused and active.
Finding this level of inner calm and practicing self-care alongside nature, let my nervous system rest and restore. From this point I was able to begin to build strength and recover my health. I started an exercise routine, very tentatively at first and building from there. This was a long and slow process but I know that finding so much calm was the foundation for being able to spiral upwards instead of downwards. Today I am more physically well than ever. Although I do still have to manage my health condition, I am living a life I never imagined possible during the days of my illness.
For me, nature connection is synonymous with inner connection. There is a deep peace that comes from paying attention, experiencing wonder and feeling connected to the world around us. For me this has been a profoundly healing, life-changing experience.
Coronavirus, isolation and nature connection
It has been a tumultuous time, socially and emotionally. The world is in the middle of a pandemic that is rocking the foundations of the global health system and economy. People are quarantined, isolated from each other, and tension and anxiety are high. I am in the fortunate position of being isolated with my extended family; 10 people on one big property. Loneliness is not a problem in this situation, though so many anxious people in one place can create clashes.
Yesterday, I was really feeling stressed. Anxiety was building inside me and it was making me feel like a caged animal. I didn’t know what to do to release this feeling and so I took a walk to the end of the garden to look for respite in nature. I lay on the lawn and watched the sky, following my breath in and out. I tuned into the sounds around me; familiar bird noises in the trees. I watched a magpie-lark fly onto a branch and realised it was returning to its nest, feeding some hungry young. Its partner then left the branch in search of food. The pair took turns foraging for food and keeping watch on the nest.
At the bottom of our garden is a small pond. It is a hotspot for nature activity. I saw a pair of pacific ducks gliding on the water. After some time, they flew in tandem across to the neighbouring garden. I sat up and moved closer to a tall patch of grass beside the pond. I noticed a ladybird clinging to a tall blade of grass. I recalled a Mary Oliver poem as I crouched there beside the pond. In her poem The Summer Day she writes “I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass, how to be idle and blessed….”. And in that moment that’s exactly how I felt, idle and blessed. What a blessing it is to be able to pay attention to the tiny and intricate happenings in nature. What a beautiful way to let tension melt from the nervous system as the body tunes into a deeper and more potent calm.
I started to notice other things then. A tiny green damselfly clinging to the tall grass, its long, slender body held perpendicular to the blade. Then I saw another one, red this time, with its body in the same position. Then another! This third one was yellow. They were like tiny jewels hidden there in the grass. I asked myself whether this was their sleeping position (it was late afternoon and the sun was low). Were they preparing for bed? Why were they all different colours? Are they different types or just variations of the same species? I wished I had brought my nature journal with me, but I didn’t want to break this magic moment by returning to the house to fetch it. Then I saw the single most elegant thing I’ve ever seen in my life. It was a long, green caterpillar, beautifully adapted to its environment with colour and texture perfectly matching the green grass and its head adapted to look like a fuzzy black grass seed. The lower part of the body was attached to the grass while the upper section was suspended in the air, as if the caterpillar was gently taking in the afternoon ambiance. When this regal creature noticed my presence, it turned its head with unfathomable grace and poise and lowered its upper body against the grass, assuming almost perfect camouflage. It’s hard for me to portray this moment in words. I felt completely in awe of such beauty and grace, and privileged to have witnessed this tiny, perfect moment.
Needless to say, after this short time spent contemplating nature, my nervous system was calm and my anxiety had been transformed into a quiet joy. It’s important to remember, in these troubling times, that nature can be an antidote to stress and anxiety. Some people are not as lucky as I am and many are confined in apartments or without access to a backyard or greenspace. The sky is accessible to most people and can be a way to be close to nature, even when there is no way to access parks or gardens. Be alert for any small way that you can connect with the natural world. This potent remedy will be a balm for you through this difficult time.
Stay safe, stay well. Please email me if you need more ideas for connecting with nature during this time.
